Former rugby league star Chris Caruana has opened up on how his life unravelled after he retired from soccer and obtained hooked on ice, leaving him on the point of suicide.
Caruana performed 10 seasons in first grade between 1992 and 2002, starring for each the North Sydney Bears and South Sydney Rabbitohs, the latter each earlier than and after the membership was kicked out of after which reinstated to the NRL.
Caruana, who signed for the Rabbitohs on a $1.2 million three-year deal on the peak of his profession, additionally appeared within the Simply the Best advert that includes Tina Turner in 1993.
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He performed 157 video games, scoring 44 tries earlier than he was launched by Souths on the finish of the 2002 season and moved to the mid-north coast of NSW, the place he performed some nation league.
But as soon as off the sector, Caruana’s life started to unravel, telling Newscorp he “realised I had nothing behind me” when he retired and slipped right into a deep despair.
Post-career struggles noticed the as soon as rugby league pin-up battle with an ice habit and homelessness, in addition to twice trying to finish his personal life.
Speaking on Nine’s Today, Caruana revealed he’s now practically three years clear and sober and going by the method of turning his life round.
“My family was the catalyst — and I couldn’t do it anymore, I was sick and tired of using narcotics,” Caruana mentioned.
“But my family, especially my mother, my sisters and, more importantly, my children, who have been my rock, Erinn and Kyle.
“That was the catalyst. I had to stop for myself really, because if I didn’t stop using, I can’t give any love and support out there to the people that love me.
“That was it, I just decided to give it away cold turkey and I’m clean today.”
Caruana revealed the depths of his habit took him to an especially darkish place.
”I handled it with narcotics,” he mentioned bluntly.
“That was the biggest mistake I did. It all came crashing down, I felt a very, very deep space of depression and anxiety – I lost a lot of money through narcotics, and it was a terrible 10 years of my life. I wish I could take that back but it’s gone now.
“Methamphetamine, it’s a very, very nasty drug. It took away a part of my soul which I’ve got back. But longest I was awake for was probably 12 days, the longest I didn’t eat was probably 14 days. I lost probably 24kg in 12 months. It’s an insidious drug.
“I can’t explain how it affects young kids out there today. I’m looking at my daughter and my son today and they’re the people I’m hanging in there for.
“Suicide was a big thing. I didn’t want to be here. And that’s where methamphetamine got me to the grips of ending it.
“Its publicly out there that I did that. I won’t be doing it again because I want to hang in there for my children and my family and especially the people that come into my life in the last month or two months.”
Although he’s clear now, he defined staying drug-free is “the toughest gig I’ve ever done”.
The 51-year-old mentioned he realised simply how essential family and friends have been in his restoration.
He additionally thanked icare for placing a roof over his head for the primary time in 4 years.
He’s now hoping to finish a certificates IV in psychological well being with a view to assist folks going by the identical points he endured.